You make me:
- wanna kiss you on the cheek.
- wanna punch you in the face.
- wanna feed you growth hormones and get this thing over with already.
- wanna throw up in my mouth a little.
- wanna pet you.
- wanna protect you.
- wanna become a lawyer and represent you.
- wanna throw you to the wolves.
- anxious to see you on a 4D reality TV show in 15 years.
- wanna lay bets on what toxins they will find in your system.
- glad I don’t know how to pronounce your name.
- glad I have no idea what your voice or your music sounds like because:
a) I might be violated by the fact it’s kinda good and it makes me happy. Or-
b) It might be really bad and make me ill.
- wanna put a lot of hairspray on your little mop top, set it aflame, film it and put it on Youtube.
- jealous I am not 12 years old with millions of girls pining for my love and affection.
- wanna make you study the life and times of Danny Bonaduce, Corey Feldman, Donny Osmond and the like.
- wanna quiz you on Classic Rock and give you dead leg and/or titty twister for every wrong answer.
- wanna get into the part of a 13 year old girl’s brain that makes her scream and cry for you and remove it.
-sad I am writing this because you might be a really nice kid with really, REALLY lame parents.